LATE Breaking News: Eddie Hosting the Oscars

Look man, I know I'm late on this & ain't been NOWHERE to be found for a while. Call it my summer break. Then, this week, I officially became Auntie TwoTimes. Sprinkle in my health issue that has had me feeling less than motivated to do ANYTHING, an anniversary & a girls' trip to NYC and you pretty much have my absence in a nutshell.

So with that said...

Eddie is hosting the Oscars. Eddie "I'm Not that Baby's Pappy" Murphy is hosting the Oscars. Now back in the day, Eddie was IT! He had classics like Beverly Hills Cop, Harlem Nights & Coming to America. After that his career was sprinkled with kinda funny movies, sorta family movies, and downright funky movies. He morphed into a "cleaned up" version of himself including cutting off his mustache OFTEN. In case you don't know... The only black man I trust without a mustache is Denzel Washington. Barack Obama  USED to be one, but he's in the questionable category now. I feel like black men cut off their 'staches for one of two reasons: 1. they messed up while shaving (either sneezed or forgot the guard on the clippers) or 2. they are hiding something. How can you hide something with a bald face, you wonder? You can't! It's OBVIOUS that something is amiss & men that DO shave their facial hair off completely do it when they "need a change". *suspicious itty bitty eye slit side eye* "I just wanted to do something different." This usually happens around the same time that they either divorce their wives, buy a sports car, change careers, or start wearing tight, sheer shirts or in SOME cases all of the above. But, I digress... as always... You love it!

The Oscars have been a notorious disaster in the hosting department lately. Anne Hathaway & James Franco almost ruined their careers with that debacle last year, po thangs. It seems comedians fair far better than actors except  when you combine actors AND comedians (Steve Martin & Alec Baldwin). Jon Stewart was good & Whoopi was good, but Eddie? Jon Stewart seems to think he is going to "kill it". Iowno about all that! Does anyone know if Eddie Murphy is still funny? I don't think the Oscars will be a great way to gauge.
You have top-rate comedians reading lines written by a mishmash of comedy greats and has-beens & professional talk & variety show writers. They are reading to an audience full of people who either are sitting with their butts CLENCHED in anticipation of winning (or losing), take themselves WAY too seriously, or just don't speak English. It's tough to make the people that only watch documentaries & foreign films that end with a crying clown popping a balloon laugh at the same things as people who list Talladega Nights in their top 10 greatest movies of all time.

It's a GREAT gig, very prestigious, but it's also a TOUGH one. I just hope he doesn't make a fool of himself or *whispering* US. Because you know ONE misstep & everyone goes in the discard pile!

So Eddie, make sure that 'stache is nice & THICK, keep it on the up & up and do NOT make any references to sexual orientation!
What's it gonna be? Dessert or disaster?

Lil Mama Moment: He Said, She Said...

In case you missed it because you were doing something more interesting like painting your toes, picking your nose or watching paint dry, Black history was made at the Oscars. Mo'Nique won Best Supposrting actress and was the first Black woman to win the statue for a movie written and directed by Black people. But one great moment in Black history was overshadowed by pure shenanigans from a Mrs. Garrett look alike with a big yap and an agenda, apparently. Now the reason I call it a Lil Mama Moment is because she jumped up on stage like she was supposed to be there & like Lil Mama was caught up in the excitement of the moment... Plus, I don't like KW lol

SHE SAID: What happened was the director and I had a bad difference over the direction of the film that resulted in a lawsuit that has settled amicably out of court. But there have been all these events around the Oscars, and I wasn’t invited to any of them. And he’s not speaking to me. So we weren’t even able to discuss ahead of the time who would be the one person allowed to speak if we won. And then, as I’m sure you saw, when we won, he raced up there to accept the award. And his mother took her cane and blocked me. So I couldn’t get up there very fast.

The movie was my idea. I live in Zimbabwe. Roger had never even heard of Zimbabwe before I told him about this. And you know, I felt my role in this has been denigrated again and again, and it wasn’t going to happen this time.

I SAY: SIT DOWN, TRICK! If things were settled amicably then, why would you not: know who was going to be "allowed to speak"? or be invited to anything having to do with the Oscars? or allegedly be blocked in by his mother?

I am not even going to get into her living in Zimbabwe or WHY! But to insult this guy and say he had never heard of Zimbabwe is basically calling him uneducated. In which case, why would you even want to WORK with him? this whole thing reads like a crazy old cat lady rant!

HE SAID: Only one person is allowed to accept the award. I was the director, and she was removed from the project nearly a year ago, but she was able to still qualify as a producer on the project, and be an official nominee. But she was very angry — she actually removed herself from the project – because she wanted more creative control.


I SAY: That was exactly how it looked. And even if she IS telling the truth, her actions just seem fishy. Either way, it was VERY poor taste on HER part to jack the mic. But very noble of him to smile and acquiesce.

Whoever was right or wrong, lying or telling the truth, Kanye or Taylor Swift, Lil Mama or Jay-Z... the whole thing was a confusing mess! I hope they can work this out MORE amicably!