Don't Do This: Pro-Black Insomnia (or Too Woke)

Hey, y'all! Let me start this off by saying I don't cuss people out no more. (Thank God for Jesus!) These days I just hold up a mirror until they get mad at their own reflection. Therefore, if you feel called out by this post... *hands you a mirror*

Now, with that being said let me say this: Some of y'all are too woke! You are so woke and pro-black that you're anti-black. You want everything black to be perfect and blackity-black through and through. You were mad about Black Panther because a white man made money off of it despite much of it being filmed at Tyler Perry Studios. Why? When do you sleep? When do you take the time to enjoy things? I know some folks don't believe in the white man's Jesus. But whoever you believe in: Buddah, Allah, Horus, Confucius, Jah, the Flying Spaghetti Monster... I am sure that entity wants you to enjoy things, right? I am sure the creator wants you to actually enjoy creation sometimes, right? And not spend all day on the white man's social media platform barking at your own people and being a career-contrarian.

You have all these problems with all things black, but never any solutions other than support black business and uplift the black man. Nobody wants to buy your terrible mixtape, Lil Alleycat! Nobody wants to read your "urban lit" book with the errant apostrophe in the title, Dark Diva! And nobody wants to buy hotep wear from a man that constantly refers to women as females, Ronshonkalon the Gawd (we all know it's just a replacement for the b-word anyway, sir). What else you got? What else are you doing out in these pro-black streets to promote positivity? Between the time you get off work in the white man's office to go home to your apartment owned by a white property management company that you pay from a white-owned bank and lay down on your Ikea bed to watch the Jewish man's network tv (because you are too woke to ever sleep), what are you doing to really help uplift the community?

Folks swear they are oh so very woke. Their pro-black insomnia has them on the highest of alerts! Nothing is ever good enough. Constantly comparing anything black to something that is predominantly other. Never fully appreciating black excellence because, in their mind, it should always be better and it's not as good as this other thing. You sleepy, ain't you? Ungrateful, negative, exhausted and ornery from their unnecessary hyper-vigilance.

To those people I say: Get you some joy! But most importantly, take a nap!

Wakanda Forever!- A Black Panther List

First of all let me say now, this is NOT a think piece.... There are ENOUGH of those going around & frankly I'm over it. EVERYTHING is problematic if you use a comb with fine enough teeth. I'm not here for none of that though. I saw Black Panther 3 times- Thursday, Saturday and Monday! Each time I saw something different. This is my SHORT list of things I got from Black Panther.

1. I am a warrior! Every single black woman from Wakanda was made of tough stuff. Strong, intelligent, loyal, and baaaaaaaaaaaad than a mother!
   
2. Colonization adversely impacted my view of Africa. I have recently been planning a trip to Africa and thinking about how all those years of Feed the Children commercials and tales of corrupt leaders made me not want to step foot on the continent for fear of being haunted by the tragedy of it all.  Thanks to a better view outside of the premiere of this movie... see below!
3. I WILL go to Africa! See above. I have done my ancestry test and I'm ready to go visit my people.
4. Eric Stephens wasn't all the way right, but he also wasn't all the way wrong. I said this was not a thinkpiece so Imma skip all the toxic masculinity and problematic, misdirected anger and just say that his core idea wasn't off base. 
   
5. It is perfectly okay to choose NOT to be a the king's queen. And you do not have to change who you are. A man that loves and respects you will do so whether you choose to spend your life with him or not. Read that again.
6. If I were a Jabari woman, I would not come out of the mountains EVER! This might seem to contradict what I just said, but up there... that was logic. This is pure lust down here. I am a well-rounded woman of a certain age that knows what she like! I mean.... did you SEE them!??! 
   
7. Throwing your wig is a perfect distraction for an escape. Wigs get HOT! People need an escape plan. Throw the wig and run away. PROBLEMS SOLVED!
8. I AM A WARRIOR! No, really. Buzzfeed said so, LOOK: "You got: Okoye...You are a force to be reckoned with. Your sense of loyalty is incredibly strong, which is why people love to have you around. You may not have tons of friends, but those select few you are friends with you are FIERCELY loyal to. You're a natural-born leader and people often look to you for guidance." DASS ME!
   
9. I WILL gorilla grunt at people that I want to stop talking! First of all, stop saying they were barking. They were GORILLAS! I will now grunt at men when they get to mansplaining or talking that toxic masculinity bull!
10. TRUST A BLACK WOMAN! If you didn't get that message, then maybe you need to watch the movie 3 times like I did. 

WAKANDA FOREVER!

I have NO idea who designed this, but here is the link to the shirt: 

https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/2278697-wakanda-forever

The Unbearable Heaviness of Being Resonable

This is only partially political... but it will be brief.

I have said before I am pro-mind-your-business. In this current climate, people just want to be left alone. In particular, the people that are not harming anyone. But EVERY DAY, this administration seems to pick on another group minding their business and it's weighing on me.

I am a live and let live type of person. If what someone is doing isn't harming others, then do your thing. Those people include: the LGBTQAI community, women, and most of the immigrant community from Latinx countries. Those that actively oppose them and march or legislate against them, I cannot abide. Therefore, when you appear under one of my posts asking me to be reasonable about a group of people that become less and less reasonable in their actions every single day, I will say something.

Today, I respectfully asked someone not to defend those people on my page. They took a snarky approach to their response, a tone that this administration often takes with those being reasonable. To which, I informed them I was attempting to preserve our relationship. Why is the preservation my job?

I am tired of waking up each morning and feeling targeted by the highest office in the land. Each day there is a new message that I as a black woman am both garbage AND guardian; trash AND trendsetter; nothing and everything and I'm tired of it. I am tired of making a statement that is true for me and having someone debate me on my own experience. I am tired of being informed and silent while others are obtuse and loud. I am tired of being stifled and swagger-jacked.

I am tired and I just want people to be reasonable. If you can't be reasonable then, please be quiet because I've got some heavy lifting to do.

Who Do You Love? Are You For Sure?

People often confuse conceit and arrogance with love for self. I know I'm not perfect but I know that my love for myself and others is real, true and pure. When I love you there is nothing anyone can do about it, not even me. I love from a place I don't even understand all the time. But I allow love to lead me. 

Some people who have never understood love think it's a bad word that leads to ruin. They don't trust themselves to be in love and subsequently they don't allow themselves to love deeply. Most importantly, these people do not love themselves in a deep or meaningful way. If they did, they would not be so afraid of allowing someone to love them and vice versa. The insecurities about love that they project out into the world start with themselves according to the African Proverb.

For example, Musiq Soulchild's song "Teach Me How To Love" was filled with learned insecurities and misleading advice that he had internalized. 

• Never crying,
• working until you're tired
• shadowing feelings with pride
• never letting people think you care 
• lacking affection and an ability to express feelings. 

He laid out EVERYTHING he was doing wrong and still placed the burden of doing the work he needed to do to heal on her. Learning to love is an individual responsibility. People can tell you what they need from you but you still need to do the work to achieve their love. That works starts internally though. Many people are afraid to delve into the caverns of their own hearts and souls. If you don't want to go in there why do you think someone else does or should? I am saying all of this to say: do the damn work!

Do the soul-searching. Be honest. Stop fronting. But most importantly leave others out of it until you are at least partially there. For those that do not know what love is, 1 Corinthians 13 lays it all out.

DO THE WORK!