Wednesday, June 30

I Watched BET Sunday, Don't Judge Me! *EDITED*

So this Sunday BET held their 10th Annual BET Awards. I HAD to see the messssss. I refused to watch the thrown together foolishness that was last year's Tribute to MJ and I only turned to it for about 5 seconds to see Tevin Campbell catterwall! But this year, I felt compelled to watch them- at someone else's house... my tv still doesn't tune into that channel EVER! So as I was at my sister's house all nestled on her couch... I tweeted and observed.

The Red Carpet Observations:
  • It appeared that they got the audience for the red carpet events from some sort of Section 8 waiting list.
  • I don't watch anything vaguely related to BET or modern "hip-hop" so I didn't know MOST of the folks cooning across the stage! I felt my IQ lowering everytime a new act came out. The clothes, the music, the lyrics & annunciation (or lack thereof) all led to me feeling dumBer than ever!
  • I noticed that Drake sings like he talks... and that's not a good thing!
  • Nick Cannon's waves had me in need of DRAMAMINE!
  • Did y'all see Dru Hill??? They looked like they escaped from the camp on But I'm a Cheerleader!

  • What in the FLOCK OF SEAGULLS was goin on on top of Nokio's head?

  • I noticed BET didn't spring for a tent. Which means that those performing (or cooning) on the red carpet likely went into the auditorium REEKING of recess! PEW!

  • Who is this little Mishon character & who told him a flat stomach = sexy! uh uh boo! A flat stomach just makes him look like he needs to eat! DOUBLE PEW!

  •  Somone said Naturi Naughton looked like a prostitute on the Starship Enterprise. I lovingly dubbed her Lt. U-WHORE-a.

  • I would like to strongly suggest that old girl from Dirty Money keep part of her face covered at all times. So we can focus on her assets & "talent" and not be distracted by her jawline & such!

  • Why did Sicki Minaj show up dressed like The Bride of Ronald McDonald??? Her hair was BEYOND orange, it was OINCH! :-/ I'm not even going to post a pic!

  • Poor Justin Combz has his daddy's mouf! He can't keep his lips closed over his grownup teef in a lil kid skull. He's got money, doe, right? lol

  • Why was Drake wearing a leather jacket? Why was Drake wearing a SMALL leather jacket? Whywas Drake wearing a vintage T-birds SMALL leather jacket?? GO GREASED LIGHTNING!

  •  Lil Scrappy was out there looking like David Banner's cousin & I thoroughly enjoyed it! THOROUGHLY!

  • Debra Lee apparently thought this was her Super Sweet Sixteen! Oscar De la Renta or not she was too oldT for that dress!

The Show Observations:

  • Kanye was on the mountaintop, but he was clearly no MLK. I was digging the effects, but I couldn't tell you anything about the song he was doing. *Kanye shrug* And what was that hanging from his neck? it looked like a giant version of one of those ghosts from Pac-Man!

  • Latifah's lounge act style intro was WAAAAAAAY over the head of the average BET viewer! as were the movie references, especially that Love Jones one. I  know most of those kids were like: Where's Wacker Flacker? (or whatever that child's name is)

  • Alicia's first performance was WEAKWAAAAACK! Her Prince performance was probably the best I've ever seen her perform! I'm NOT an A. Keys fan... so I guess that's a big deal lol

  • T.I. and Travis Barker... WOW and ME-ooooooooooooooooow! I love teeny-tiny T.I.! YUMMERS!

  • It seemed to me that the only thing you need to have to be nominated for a BET Award is ONE song! Not even a hit, just a song that played on BET at some point. Who WERE these people???

  • Someone said Monica was wearing gargoyle wings. I agreed! But why was Deneice Williams looking like she was trapped in 88? and she didn't sound so great! :-( I need an Unsung on Neicey because I need to know what happened to her and her voice.

  • AND THEN THERE WAS CHRIS BROWN.... I tried to link to the video, but something happened :( But I want to say this... real tears, fake tears, etc., etc. HE... DID... THE... THING! He was so MJ. I was screaming and cheering and cheesing. I loved every second of it. I wish he had been able to get through Man in the Mirror, but even still... it was AMAZING!

  • Then BET busted out with El Debarge with NO warning! and he broke it broke it DOWN! He sounded good & looked waaaaaaay better than that mugshot I last saw him in. WOOF!

Side Notes:

  • I said they knocked on some crypt doors & turned over some rocks for this show. My sister said they dragged folks outta rehab! (both true statements).

  • Tyrese can reaaaaallly reallllly sing. However he needs to stick to doing JUST and ONLY that!!

  • Why was Kirk Franklin even trying to sing? and why did he look like he recently had a stroke?? UGH!

  • Drake's jackets got progressively smaller throughtout the night. Does anyone know if he was wearing a BOLERO at the afterparty???

I stopped watching after El because I was ready to go home & I was way over the "awards" they were GIVING out. I saw the A. Keys performance after the fact on the youtubes or what haves you. But I was reading Twitter while the "performances" were going on for the Prince tribute & read that Prince was LESS than enthused and amused by MOST of them. *tsk tsk tsk*

Overall, I think BET did a GREAT job with the theatrics of the performances, they weren't BORIN! The award son the other hand... PURE FOOLERY & UNEDUCATED GUESSES, imo.

So, there you have it!
(y'all I really need to start proofing before I send! This thing was a MESS! but I want to get y'all the good word as i type it! lol)


KW said...

I didn't watch it but this makes me feel like I got it and all in all, I didn't miss much.

LOL @ Lt. U-WHORE-a ... pretty good.

Rashad said...

I was flipping through channels right when the prince tribute started. Usually I have a moral imperative not to watch BET because I like my brain cells. But I stuck around a minute for prince. I mean hell, IT'S PRINCE! But I whole heartedly agree with your opinions on the rest of the minstrel show that is BET.

B. Cooley said...

KW- glad I could be of service!

Rashad- lol @ moral imperative! The one part you WATCHED was the one part I SKIPPED! lol