From the devotional The Dream Centered Life by Luke Barnett
It got me to thinking how we fall into pits -because life, duh- and choose to stay there. They make the pit home. we choose not to learn how to get out of the pit and how to subsequently avoid the pit the next time. Folks get comfortable in the pit because they have been there so long struggling with how to get out. And don't you dare try to enter the pit with them or help them out! They live there now. I find this happens a lot in failed relationships and business ventures. These two things can elicit the same passion from us. We put all we know how into both things. The same longing for success that when they fail, can cause us to be inconsolable and so overwhelmed with the failure that the only lesson we think we learn is to never ever do that again in any way shape or form.
I know far too many that fall into the pit and it makes them bitter. But they don't see it. They choose not to care about anything anymore. They lose their compassion for others because they would rather forget those feelings they felt when they fell into the pit initially. They put their capacity to love another thing (person, place, idea) on ice because they want or need to appear tough. For whom? For what? Bitterness isn't always constantly ranting about how people didn't support your dreams. Bitterness can be as subtle as sabotaging another opportunity to invest your time, talent, and expertise elsewhere. Bitterness isn't always posts about not being a sucker for love ever again. It can be as subtle as shunning a relationship with a person you know loves you. Bitterness can became so much a fabric of our lives that we don't recognize it. We spend so much time in the pit that it looks and feels like home. We've decorated it, installed cable and changed our mailing address. We've tasted straight lemon juice so often that we think we prefer it to lemonade.
I now know more and more people that are opting to get out of the pit. Sometimes they do it alone, but it becomes much easier when you ask for help. See, we have lost our capacity to ask for help for so many reasons. Sometimes it's just because we don't know what help we need. Using the pit as a time for introspection and honesty is the only way to know for sure what you need to escape from it. Not everyone that walks by you in the pit is going to help you out. Some may join you, ignore you, or even convince you to stay. This is why how you use your time in the pit is so crucial.
How did you get here?
How long do you plan to stay here?
How did you feel before this?
How do you feel now?
How do you want to feel after?
What can you do to get out in the safest way?
What healthy changes can you make once you are out?
Will you need help getting out of here?
Who can help you out of here?
These are just a few questions we can ask ourselves.
Look around you, have you made the pit your home? It's never too late to escape. Forgive yourself for staying in your bitterness so long. But for goodness' sake, do the work to get out of the pit. You owe it to yourself to be better not bitter and avoid the same pitfall again.
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