Tuesday, January 12

PARCHED!

Yesterday on Twitter someone I follow posted a pic of some girl wearing a thong, holding a hand written sign with her MySpace & Twitter info up in the mirror. *sigh* First of all, the "young lady" did not even have the wherewithal to write the information in reverse, the means by which to FLIP the picture so the information was readable, or the spatial perception to be able to fit it all on a 8.5 x 11 sheet properly; not too bright. Second of all,  her bottom, while big was also discolored and a little dented up; unattractive. Third, and most importantly, she was self-promoting  in a thong all over the internet; low self-esteem. Now granted, I don't KNOW this child from a pile of dust, but I can make some educated guesses about her from that picture. I am not passing judgment I am moreso questioning her motives and the motives of other "young ladies" like her that I see all over the internet.

Hey, I was wild & free at one point. But I also attempted to maintain a modicum of modesty. My girls and I have turned down NFL players and been BRUTALLY honest with well-known entertainers. Here's an example:
We were partying it up on the stage at a well-known DC hotspot in about 2006 or so (I'm bad with dates). A well-known entertainer was standing nearby and struck up a conversation with us. He asked us if we liked his outfit. We looked him up and down, I shook my head and my girl said: "No, you look DUMB!" He continued to talk to us and even introduced himself as if we didn't know who he was, we did.  And we told him we did. He continued to talk and laugh with us for the rest of the night anyway.

The point of this story is the OTHER women in the club that night. They were standing close by whispering and giggling and then coming over, poking their chests out and swinging their weaves smiling in his face, dancing extra HARD all around him and TRYING to get his attention. In between their displays, he would laugh and talk to us. These other women would be what urban slang refers to as "thirsty". Urbandictionary.com defines thirsty as such: 1. Too eager to get something (especially play) 2. Desperate. Use of the word "play" not withstanding, this is exactly what THOSE women were. Over the years, I have watched "thirsty" transform into downright "parched". I subscribe to various urban blogs that feature pictures of women out in the streets, scantily clad, sans undergarments posing for the cameras and allowing who I presume to be strangers do things to them that only a husband should do to a wife in the privacy of their boudoir and sometimes employing the use of a "safe word". But I digress.

What has these YOUNG females SO attention-starved that they are embarrassing their parents AND children all over the world wide web? Many people would say that it is because they didn't have a daddy. But I know several women who didn't have a daddy and I have YET to see them touting their goods (or bads) on the interwebs. And who is to say that a daddy could stop these shenanigans? I know OF adult entertainers whose parents are still together.

So what IS the problem? BET! Ok, not really, but really. The media glorifies overt sexuality and rewards whoremongering and foolishness. I enjoy a lil public decompensation every now and then (it's the forensic psychologist in me), but NOT to the detriment of our youth and young and extremely impressionable women-to-be.

As I was typing this blog, another picture surfaced on Twitter of a "young lady" with "Five-Star Chick" tattooed from shoulder to shoulder and neck to chest. I understand this is from a song that is out by some extremely unfortunate looking "young man" that goes by the name Yo Gotti. I had to Google all of this because, I'm out of the urban radio loop! But as I read the lyrics... his definition of a Five-Star Chick (which isn't even the TERM he uses) isn't five-star at all. It is, to me and the WOMEN I know, standard. Here are some of the qualities he lists:
  1.  Not living with her mother.
  2. Not fighting in the club.
  3. Not a groupie.
  4. Nice shoes and purses.
  5. Can cook and clean.
  6. Went to college.
  7. Pledged a sorority. (perhaps this is optional)
  8. Has good credit.



This isn't five-star. This is being a responsible ADULT. He also mentions an extreme amount of sexual conduct and other FOOLISHNESS! All of which is "rewarded" by him giving her money. *sigh*
How thirsty, sad on the inside, and low standard having can you BE to allow THIS man and other ne'er-do-wells of his ilk (pun intended) to have you tattooing your ENTIRE chest and advertising your "wares" on the internet?

Nowhere does he mention anything about a TRUE five-star lifestyle which includes money in the bank, investments, nor any 5-star restaurants, hotels or vacations. I just googled the remix and GUCCI MANE mentions meeting him AT a five-star hotel. But a REAL five-star woman should have her OWN room in said hotel. (I feel my brain ROTTING as I read these lyrics). There are verses by Trina and Nicki Minaj that actually address these matters, it seems but the manner in which they do it kind of causes the "message" to get lost amongst the ignorance, bad grammar, and braggadocio.

Somehow along the way, the next generations' standards have been LOWERED. The things that I think are basic standards have become the mountaintop and those things I thinkof as sub-par have become what is basic. Even spawning a term in the urban community. How did THEY get to this LOW point? and how can WE help them see beyond it. This up and coming generation isn't just THIRSTY, they are PARCHED for something better. But their goals and ways and means have been skewed and sullied by the likes of THIS guy:



I, for one plan to do something about it. These "young ladies" are being turned into a generation of "Olivias"- lost and turned out and certain members of society are rewarding them for it. All they see is the reward, not the retribution, risk, or repercussions.

So to the girls on the internet who will read this (wait, they probably won't *smh*) who will think I am "hating" on you. I'm not... I just want YOU to want better for yourself and understand that you have to set your standards not Yo Gotti, or Trina, or Nicki Minaj, or Gucci Mane... or the guy on Myspace posing with the stack of money (likely ones)... or the guy on Twitter DMing you about how nice your body is. YOU have to want better and DO better for yourself. You have to be able to look in the mirror and LIKE who you see fully clothed! Quench your own thirst, don't waste your valuable time seeking out someone to quench it for you.

Just as an aside: I started this blog with a totally different idea in mind, but once I saw that Twitpic and started researching those lyrics... I had to go where the writing led me...

4 comments:

{Ms. P} said...

*sings* "Lost & turned oooooooooooooooouuu-OUT!"

Mimicutelips said...

This was very well said, sad part is those that NEED to hear this information probably won't read it. Forget bringing sexy back, in 2010 we need to bring STANDARDS back. This settle for anything mentality is no way to living; in fact it isn’t living at all.

EACH ONE TEACHES ONE!

CB said...

So sad yet so true. These little girls have the wrong idea of what a woman is and, unfortunately, their mother's are the prime example in addition to music videos. Thank you for spreading the truth. Unfortunately..... it probably won't reach as far or as deep as a Trina or Nikki Minaj song/video. *deep sigh*

CB said...

So sad yet so true. These little girls have the wrong idea of what a woman is and, unfortunately, their mother's are the prime example in addition to music videos. Thank you for spreading the truth. Unfortunately..... it probably won't reach as far or as deep as a Trina or Nikki Minaj song/video. *deep sigh*